A kid-free wedding. Seems simple enough, right? But there’s always a chance for an exception, from the flower girl your mother-in-law insists on having to your maid of honor’s infant daughter. We’re answering your wedding etiquette questions and how to handle the topic with grace.

Be Prepared for “No”

Many parents will probably be excited to have a kid-free night out for your wedding, but others won’t want to leave their kids at home for the night, which means some of those guests with children will decide not to attend your wedding. So while you shouldn’t rearrange all of your plans (or force yourself to learn to love kids) just so a few extra guests can attend, you should understand that you will have guests choose not to celebrate with you because of your adults-only policy.

 Address the Invites Properly

The most traditional way to let people know their children aren’t invited to your wedding is with proper envelope addressing.  Only list ton the invite, which means they’re invited—and no one else is. If you write “The Scott Family,” you’re including parents and children, so don’t do it!

Add it to the Invite

Some wedding guests will not know the nitty gritty of envelope addressing etiquette. So once they’ve opened the envelope, remind them that there are no kids allowed. In the lower left corner, opposite where you’ve printed the dress code, simply add the words “Adults Only.” Pretty clear, huh?

 Announce it as Much as Possible

The more frequently you note that children aren’t invited, the more likely you’ll be to have an actually kid-free wedding. Print “Adults Only” on your save the dates and invitations. Mention it on the FAQ page of your wedding website, as well as on the wedding day timeline. And have your parents, in-laws, and wedding party spread the word, too.